Chapters
- Chapter 30.1
- Chapter 29.2
- Chapter 29.1
- Chapter 28
- Chapter 27
- Chapter 26
- Chapter 25
- Chapter 24
- Chapter 23
- Chapter 22
- Chapter 21.2
- Chapter 21.1
- Chapter 20.2
- Chapter 20.1
- Chapter 19.2
- Chapter 19.1
- Chapter 18
- Chapter 17
- Chapter 16
- Chapter 15
- Chapter 14
- Chapter 13
- Chapter 12
- Chapter 11.2
- Chapter 11.1
- Chapter 10
- Chapter 9
- Chapter 8
- Chapter 7
- Chapter 6
- Chapter 5
- Chapter 4
- Chapter 3
- Chapter 2
- Chapter 1
- Chapter 0
Typography
I’ve Become an Onahole, But I’ll Still Climb The Tower - 16
Inside the pitch-dark cabin where not even an inch ahead is visible.
[User JojiDelicious has donated 50,000 won.]
Hey, you asleep?
"No, I'm not."
lololol
ffs
no bait pls
be serious, guys
So, are they coming or not tonight?
If my prediction is correct, the rapist will probably watch for 1-2 days before attacking.
But you never know.
The real culprit might be so horny they come for me tonight.
And since I’m not willing to gamble with my baby maker, I can’t sleep.
‘I’m just gonna sleep’ ye right lol
Yeah, they’re not coming today
No more baiting with donations
I was messing around in chat with the viewers when—
Step. Step...
Footsteps echoed slowly.
"Shh..."
gasp
they actually came wtf
RUNNNNNNNNNN!!!
I quickly closed the chat and pretended to sleep.
Steady, calm breathing, waiting for them to enter.
After a short pause,
creak...
The old wooden door creaked as it opened.
thunk!
And then closed.
'Now.'
I won’t let some filthy rapist touch even my collar.
Like a cat in the dark, I swiftly rushed forward and struck the intruder in the gut.
thud!
"Guh!"
He bent forward from the surprise attack, and I locked in a rear naked choke around his neck.
"Krrgh... mmph!"
A desperate struggle for life.
He tries to pull my arms off, scratches, kicks—but my grip doesn’t loosen.
Soon, the unknown man’s body slackens and he loses consciousness.
"Hah, what a loser."
I laid him on the bed and lit a small candle to check his face.
And it turns out...
"Paul?"
The red-haired son of the village chief.
"Wait, hold on..."
Feeling uneasy, I pulled down his pants.
"Ah, fuck..."
No scar on his lower abdomen.
We’re screwed...
Let’s just kill the bastard
lmfao
I knew this would happen
It’s fine, just hide the body first lol
"No, we can’t kill him..."
Goddammit.
I’m so pissed I could stab Paul’s neck as he peacefully sleeps on my bed.
But killing him means no true ending.
"Why the hell did he come here?"
Could it be one of those twists where there are two culprits?
"No no, the victim’s statement was clear. Plus, this idiot..."
I pull his pants down further to double-check.
"It’s tiny."
gasp
T_T
Poor baby Paul
smol...
what
lololol
hey now!
HEY HEY HEY
damn now I feel kinda bad
maybe he came here cause no girl ever wanted him...
"Hmm... what do we do with this guy?"
The safest plan would be to say he tried to assault me while I was sleeping and I fought back...
'But then the real guy won’t show up.'
I’ve been playing up this image of a careless, easy target girl, and it’ll all go to waste.
In that case...
"Where does this guy live again?"
Guess I have no choice.
He’s not gonna go around saying, 'I tried to rape that adventurer and got choked out!'
lol
dude’s gonna be so confused when he wakes up
he’ll be too embarrassed to show his face
like he’s definitely not gonna tell anyone
So I carried him back to his room and quietly laid him on his bed.
whack!
As payback for the trouble, I slapped his thigh. He’ll probably feel sore tomorrow.
"Phew..."
I’m exhausted. With no sleep, lugging around dead weight and walking back and forth.
And the worst part? Thinking I caught the bastard, only to realize it wasn’t him.
"Ugh, I’m just gonna sleep. If someone comes, you know the drill with the donation alert, right? I’m counting on you guys."
We got you!
Nah, I wanna see you get wrecked~
Do you really trust us?
You’re putting your faith in us?
Ding~
[User DoheeTunaIsDelish has donated 100,000 won.]
Dohee, wake up! RAPISTTTTTTT!!!!
ffs
ughh
That’s more like it
H-scene where???
Nooo!! Not my porn!!!!
You morons, if it ends here so does the porn!
dammit
'What the hell?'
I jolted up at the donation sound.
"Huh?"
"Mm!"
Someone is halfway on top of me.
I quickly lift my knee and strike toward their groin.
thunk!
But he barely dodges by curling his legs.
A fist comes flying in the dark.
I tilt my head and dodge, then gather all my strength and kick him in the torso.
crash!!
He flies, hits the wooden wall, and lands cleanly on the floor.
"Who are you!"
This guy’s no ordinary man. In this village, only a few could move like that...
shing!
The sound of a sword being drawn.
I grab the spear leaning beside the bed and point it at him.
A tense silence hangs over the dark cabin.
The only light, a sliver of moonlight trickling from the ceiling.
We stare each other down, then dash forward without a word.
whoosh!!
Faint silhouette, footsteps, breathing.
I use it all to locate him and thrust my spear hard.
The spear glints in the moonlight.
But he shifts his sword to the side, deflects the spear, and charges in.
He swings with that momentum.
swish—
I pull the spear back and step away just as his sword slices through where I was.
I could’ve lost my torso there.
'Crazy bastard... He’s trying to kill me?'
"[Haste]"
This isn’t a fight I can win if I hold back. I only have 1 Agility, but that’s better than nothing.
Instead of attacking recklessly, I use the distance to aim at his legs.
He tries to dash in, but only ends up with shallow wounds as I retrieve the spear quickly.
"Tch, were you hiding your skills this whole time?"
A deep, mature male voice. He keeps his distance, focused entirely on avoiding my thrusts.
"And you, weren’t you hiding some disgusting desires of your own?"
clang!
He barely deflects the spear and backs off.
In this pitch black room.
I give him no chance to track the spear.
Fakes and real strikes rain down in a dazzling flurry.
Pretending to aim for the leg—then I go for his head. Hits the shoulder, but I’m racking up damage.
"Damn it... this is unreal."
He tries a last-ditch charge, but my spear grazes his hand, forcing him to retreat again.
"How... how is this happening... Me, losing to a woman..."
Sparks fly as spear meets sword. He pushes through with brute strength, and my spear is forced back, but just as he gets close—
A surprise strike slices his shin.
"Guh... this can’t be... bested by a mere woman..."
The difference wasn’t strength, but skill and experience.
"Repent in the afterlife."
I went in for the final blow to his throat.
That moment, his eyes gleamed blue in the dark.
"You brought this on yourself."
With his words, tremendous energy surged through his body.
KWAANG!!!
'Is that... aura?'
Mana exploded from his body, collapsing the shabby cabin and launching me outside.
"Guh!"
Through the flying dust and shards of timber, I saw him charging at me with glowing blue eyes and his sword infused with mana.
I knocked some wood shards with my spear to obscure his vision, then rolled aside to dodge.
VOOOOM!!!
The sound of air tearing where I had just been. He resumed a cautious combat stance.
‘Ha! I expected this, but the difficulty really is insane!’
I should’ve known from the moment he blocked my punch at the chief’s house.
His face, now visible under the soft moonlight.
"Captain Michael! Why the hell did you attack me!!!"
People were starting to gather after the explosion of the cabin.
But Michael showed no signs of retreating. In fact, blue mana continued to gather around his body, signaling his resolve to focus solely on battle.
"Ha!"
I like it.
This situation is fucked, but I’m actually thrilled.
How long has it been?
How long since I last faced a life-or-death fight?
How long since a battle stirred my blood?!
As soon as I saw the muscles in his thigh compressing, the ground shattered and he was right in front of me.
shhk!!
I barely dodged his sword stabbing for my chest and countered with my spear—
But the tip bounced back like it hit a spinning sawblade.
His horizontal slash followed, which I narrowly dodged by leaping backward.
"Sorry, but you die here. Undercover investigator Pitsina Ibenstein."
'Fuck.'
He knew everything?
The air changed. His blade gathered condensed blue mana.
A spatial slash using sword aura.
A crescent-shaped wave sliced vertically through the air, splitting the ground.
"Hrrgh!!"
I took a deep breath and dove sideways. Right then, a second strike laced with aura came crashing down, aiming to bisect me.
The weapons entangle.
My spear and his sword clash midair.
Of course, his aura-infused sword was overpowering my spear, shaving it down.
But that tiny gap.
I use it to redirect his.
His blade’s trajectory shifted and slowed.
I dropped the spear and dove into his range.
"What?"
He must've expected me to keep blocking. His body was fully leaning forward.
From my legs, I gathered every ounce of strength and punched him squarely in the jaw.
WHAM!!
Even as he staggered, he tried swinging sideways, but I ducked and swept his legs hard.
"Gah?"
Then I grabbed my spear from the ground and stabbed his chest.
CRACK!!!
His heart burst and blood splattered.
"Kuhh... how?"
His gaze trembled. Not in fear of death, but in confusion over the loss.
"Talent."
thud...
Michael’s eyes wavered as if demanding an explanation, then stopped.
Sorry, I have nothing else to say.
Honestly, there are like twenty things I want to critique about his moves, but there’s no time.
'Hoo... now what?'
Everyone was holding their breath after the chaos. A cabin exploded and two people were flying around fighting in the middle of the night. Of course they’re stunned.
I had to speak before they questioned anything.
'No need to reveal I’m an investigator.'
"Phew, everyone!! I just caught a psycho sex offender who broke into my room!!"
"Oh?"
"Huh?"
"The Captain... a sex offender?"
I couldn’t let them have time to process it.
What I said was true, but with no immediate evidence, these crazy villagers might still try to kill me.
Of course I wouldn’t lose, but all my effort so far would be wasted.
I went into the destroyed cabin and pulled out the sack I’d prepared earlier, stuffed Michael into it.
Just before zipping it, I checked below again. The scar and forearm matched, he was the real culprit.
"Hey... what’s going on?"
"The Captain!! What are you doing to him!!"
Those close to him were starting to block my path.
'Damn it, this shitty mission.'
The cursed part of the 3rd floor trial:
To capture the real culprit and get the true ending, you must bring the body safely to the city. Which makes assassination or sniping really hard.
'Screw it~ whatever.'
I dashed with the body bag. The villagers grabbed weapons and gave chase.
"Get her!!!"
"She’s a murderer!!!"
"I told you he was a fucking predator!!"
And I reached the village entrance.
"Oh..."
What rotten luck.
The huge herbalist, Lude, was standing guard at the gate.
'Dammit, I’m out of time...'
But then,
"Go! Hurry!"
'Huh???'
He subtly stepped aside and opened the gate for me.
'What the hell...'
I don’t know his reason, but I owed him now.
I bowed slightly and ran off and the gate closed behind me.
Soon after, I heard noise from inside and the gate reopened, but I had already gotten a solid lead.
"Wooo!!! Guys, I freaking did it!!"
Though it was too early to relax.
I quickly untied my horse from nearby, mounted, and rode off.
The distance between me and the chasing villagers grew until they disappeared from sight.
I actually pulled it off...
"Hahahahaha!!! THIS IS IT!! THIS IS THE FEELING!!"
The thrill of victory after so long.
"Guys, isn’t this a world first? 3rd floor, SS rank!!!"
That’s right.
A guard captain who suddenly used aura.
Even knowing my identity in advance.
Just fighting him earns you an S-rank, but pulling off the true ending condition too?
That bumps it to SS.
As far as I know, no one’s gotten SS rank here yet.
I opened the chat with high hopes.
"How was I?"
Damn
You fought insanely well, wtf?
Wow... that was badass
I gotta give it to you this time
How'd you even win that?
Kyaaaa~
Came for the rumors, show me your boobs
Is this seriously a world first?
Definitely in Korea at least
Fuck, that was nuts
Oh...
So this is Lee Dohee?
"Hahahahahahaha!!"
This is why I stream. Hell yeah!
“hmph~”
"???"
Suddenly, my vision flipped.
I felt weightless. I was flying through the air, thrown off the horse.
"Eh?"
'What the hell?'
Thud bang bang!!
My body slammed into the ground and rolled violently with the momentum.
"Kugh... ugh!!"
Felt like I just got hit by a car. I could barely breathe.
'What just happened?'
Looks like the horse tripped on something. Out of nowhere?
'Ah...'
I soon saw the cause.
KIEEEEEE!
KISHAAAH!!
Goblins. A horde of goblins was charging out from the forest, crazed and frothing.
And then all those things the villagers said came flooding back.
—We normally don’t take in adventurers, but goblins show up around here too often to ignore it.
—Yeah, monsters have been showing up more around the fort lately.
—We’ll have to post a monster subjugation request soon. Goblins are getting bold and the women can’t even leave the house...
—It's dangerous outside the village, you shouldn't even go to the well alone.
Even the overly fortified wooden walls around the village...
All the clues had been warning me about the goblins.
"Haha... so this is it, huh? They’re not giving out SS rewards that easily."
I should’ve known it was going too smoothly.
"Fine then! Come at me all at once, I’ll kill all your worthless goblins!"
Looks like it’s gonna be a long night.